I can remember when I was a child pondering Good Friday and feeling sorry for Jesus because of the pain He endured. I didn’t grasp then why He endured such pain, that there was salvation at work, rather than just suffering and death, and that I should, in fact, be profoundly and constantly grateful for that day. I also never understood all of the pain that existed as part of Jesus suffering while here on earth. I never considered the loneliness He must have sometimes endured, both in everyday life, but especially at the cross. Think about how often we hear in the bible of people who sought Jesus because of a need they had, and then ponder how often we hear of those who simply wanted to spend time with Him for His own sake. The instances are a bit more sparse.
When Jesus was in the garden praying to the Father shortly after his last Passover meal with His disciples, He experienced all of our emotions and pain, He knew that He would be abandoned and denied by those who were closest to Him. He knew that their faith in Him would be shaken, and yet His concern was for their wellbeing, and not His own. He did ask the Father that if the cup could pass Him by, to let it be so, but He also added, that not His will, but the Fathers be done in this. He was having a very frank talk with the Father about what He was feeling and experiencing, He did not deny it, He just let it all come out, and He still trusted enough to not only be honest but to tell the Father that He would accept whatever His decision was. No reticence, no caveats, no lacking in His faith in the one He knows can always be counted on to do what is ultimately best for us, and for all, even when we don’t understand it.
When the time arrived, and those who sought to arrest Him came, and He had to leave all of those closest to Him, He went without struggle, like a lamb, and accepted what had been decided. He knew that despite anything being possible for the Father, that prophecy was to be fulfilled, and fully accepted that He alone would bear that burden. He was alone after being taken from His disciples, He was alone in front of His accusers, He must have felt even more alone when Peter denied Him, and He was profoundly alone on the cross when He called out to the Father to ask why He had forsaken Him.
So, how much does He continue to feel alone now when we call upon Him only in times of adversity or want. He often doesn’t hear from us when we are doing well, we don’t think to share our lives with Him, to keep Him company, and to make Him part of our lives. Can you imagine the hurt and rejection of someone who wants so desperately to be loved by us, and who often can only look into our lives as an outsider, to not be able to feel part of our families or circle of friends? And yet, even there, His first thought is of what is best for us, He calls us to community with our Church family because He knows we do not do well on our own, and that we need one another. He calls us to commune, and to care for each other, to spend time in fellowship, and to receive gifts from Him in the form of His body and blood to strengthen us. He is more concerned with our well-being than with His own, as He has always been. He shows agape love, the selfless love that puts ones self last, and instead elevates the needs of others.
If we have any conscience at all, we have to ask ourselves, how can we change this? How can we love the way we are loved by our Lord, and in doing so draw closer to Him whose love and sacrifice have always existed, and are constant and ongoing? We can start by simply spending that most precious of commodities, our time. We can pray – it need not be fancy or formal, just talk. Tell the Lord how your day went, tell him what you are planning for your weekend, ask Him to be part of it, and most of all tell Him that you love Him. Tell Him that you didn’t mean to so often leave Him out of your everyday life. You can show Him that you have learned from Him and His example, by showing the same care for others. Find someone that you even suspect might be lonely and make it a point to reach out. A phone call, a letter, even an email or text, anything to break the isolation and monotony that so many are feeling right now. There is no better way to show that we kneel before the cross, than to simply take to heart our Lords example of sacrifice even in the smallest of ways. It will not go un-noticed. Loneliness is something that our Lord can well relate to, and to try to quench that same feeling in one of the least of His children will be appreciated by the one who bore so much pain, so much suffering, and so much loneliness Himself.
The Deacons Bench 